Definition of a friend according to Webster...
Friend: 1 a: one attached to another by affection or esteem
2 a: one that is not hostile b: one that is of the same nation, party, or group
3: one that favors or promotes something (as a charity)
4 : a favored companion
We have a lot of examples of great friendship and loyalty in the Bible: David/Jonathan, Ruth/Esther, Paul/Timothy, James/John... just to name a few.
However, I think Jesus is the best example of what a true friend is; we will look at some of His characteristics in friendship and His expectations for us as His followers.
John 15: 12 - 17
12My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. 14You are my friends if you do what I command. 15I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. 16You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit—fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. 17This is my command: Love each other.
Vs 13... He sacrificed Jesus laid down his life for his friends... made the ultimate sacrifice by dying on the cross.
Vs 15... He is humble, "...considers his disciples friends, not servants, even though he has every right to do so. "a servant does not know his masters business." They know his business...
Mathew 14: 32 – 34
32They went to a place called Gethsemane, and Jesus said to his disciples, "Sit here while I pray." 33He took Peter, James and John along with him, and he began to be deeply distressed and troubled. 34"My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death," he said to them. "Stay here and keep watch."
Took 3 of his friends, he needed their presence, he needed them to physically be there, needed their companionship during an overwhelming time.
Not concerned with how He is viewed by His friends, will they think "He doesn't have it all togher." "It may make them struggle, " "they'll think less of me"... often these are the excuses we use to not reach out... at least these are some of my temptations... what are your reasons?
Jesus is vulnerable with his friends, reaches out for help, yet He does not expect them to have the answers to his troubles... "Sit here while I pray," "Stay here and keep watch."
John 13:
12When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. "Do you understand what I have done for you?" he asked them. 13"You call me 'Teacher' and 'Lord,' and rightly so, for that is what I am. 14Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another's feet. 15I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.
He is a servant to his friends: non-presumptuous, not worried about his status, title or the way perhaps his friends would view him.
He sets an example that He wants us to follow... Vs 14 of John
Back to John 15:
16You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit—fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. 17This is my command: Love each other.
Look at vs 9,
9"As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. 10If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love.
It's a command for us to love one another in this way!
Why does He talk about friendship, bearing fruit and love for one another interchangeably? ...
John 13: 34"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. 35By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another"...
The world will see Jesus through us!
We see how we are supposed to love each other according to Jesus' example.... so, what hinders our relationships with one another? ... Is it pride, arrogance, laziness, bitterness, selfishness?
1 John 1:
Walking in the light
5This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. 6If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth. 7But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all[b] sin.8If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. 9If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 10If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives.
... Being in the light allows us to Vs 7..."have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus." (apparently very important for salvation.) This is not to be taken lightly... we are not meant to be islands... we were created to be in fellowship with one another and in turn will bring glory to God... Psalm 133: 1 How good and pleasant it is
when brothers live together in unity!
Is there a hint of resentment, bitterness, criticalness? I know for me, I became convicted as I read these scriptures. As I was looking for scriptures to help me share my convictions, I saw that I have fallen so short and I need to grow so much in this area.... I want to say I am sorry for not loving you the way that God calls me to, I know that I have let you and God down.
This is where I have fallen short... 1 John 2:9-11
9Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates his brother is still in the darkness. 10Whoever loves his brother lives in the light, and there is nothing in him[c] to make him stumble. 11But whoever hates his brother is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness; he does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded him.
Hate is a strong word, but remember; there is no gray area with God, we either love our sisters/brothers, or we hate them...
True definition of love... 1 Corinthians 13: 4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8Love never fails.
....opposite of love... could it be defined as hate?
Why do we love each other, confess to each other, and serve each other...1 John 4: 19-21
19We love because he first loved us. 20If anyone says, "I love God," yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. 21And he has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother.
I will leave you with a beautiful poem very close to my heart... we all long to be this and have this....
Between The Miles
by Heather Stoop
Because existence can become severe
in one day,
just sense me and I'll be there.
In the minds eye,
I'm not so far away.
If you hold out your hand,
in the whispers,
I'll become the zephyr.
and besiege you.
If your eye's upon the stars,
in the crystalline darkness,
I'll become the moon.
And the light shall guide you.
If you rest upon the ground,
in the warmth,
I'll become the grass.
And embrace you.
If you turn outside,
in the wetness,
I'll become the rain.
An upon your forehead, kiss you.
If you free the air,
in the light of day,
I'll become the sun.
And smile for you.
Between the miles-
if you need me.
If you need a friend.
Let me be the friend, I want to be.
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